Running Destruction

I probably should have started this sooner as hopefully Petunia will be finding a new home soon. However I'm going to keep a running tally of currently destroyed items they seem to get into.  I'm not going to post this as new, just edit and add to it, so if you are totally bored, check back often.

Box of raisins, squished into floor, box in tiny pieces
Book to the details of Berthas "customization"
4 bowls of cat food
one stuffed bear
2 ink pens
part of a ziplock bag
backing to a rug
syringe
several clothes pins
cord to the fan for the van
that majority of the porch floor
ink pen
more porch floor
container from my lunch
many pieces of paper
several ink pens
A box of LARGE dog flea pills
Pink highlighter
Christmas tree decorations
rubber ball
my key chain
pair of crocs
Ed Hardy GLASS
kitchen rug
part of the window sill
1/2 package of turkey bacon
3/4 pack of computer paper
roll of toilet paper
part of the dog bed
pair of crocs

Dear Petunia

You should not use Moses as a mentor.  For example he bit our old boss who was visiting today.  This is not a good thing as he weighs more, plus your mother doesn't want to get fired.  I do however have a few examples of things that are mine and should not go outside. Also some of these things were meant to be outside and should not come in.

Underwear.  The laundry hamper holds these until I wash them. Just because it is the short one and you can reach it does not mean you should take them outside.  They line dry INSIDE when they are clean.

Sticks:  I have a gun, I don't need a stick.  You also do not need a stick.  I do not like to find sticks buried in bed.  I do not like to find sticks buried on the couch.  I do not like sticks in tiny pieces mixed with your drool.

Lunch:  I've been bringing my lunch so I can save money to feed you beast.  Removing the tupperware from my bag and sharing it with Moses is not good.  While you shredded the top to mix with your sticks, the bottom would have still been good.  I do appreciate you bringing it back inside, however the 3 cups of dirt that were left in it after you dug it up were not fun to clean up.

Cats: while you may like to chase them, that is all they are around for.  Please do not remove the coupons for free cat food from my bag and shred them again.  The cats will not die faster this way.  Please leave their tootsie rolls alone, they are not really that tasty and do not smell good. 

Yard stuff:  rubber mulch is not digestible, quit eating it.  Pooper scooper is not to be drug around the yard, this causes it to break.

  Holes: while Mo feels the need to dig caves for the winter he does not need your help.  Dirt sticks to your ears, please refrain from wallowing in it.

Other than that you are the perfect puppy and I hope we can raise enough $$ to fix your leg and find you a home with some kids to live with.

It's like playing Bingo, but by yourself

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Lily: not that there's anything wrong with liking you - I like you lol

Chele:: its one day at a time, he has potential due to the fact he at least has a personality

Lily: but it's like feeding a kitten

Chele:: how so?

Lily: you feed it & then it wants petted & then it wants snuggled &; then it wants that all again &; then you have to talk to it &; feed it again &; then it's living with you &; brings its friends

Chele:: so that is different for me than??

Lily: well, this is a man, not a quiet unconditional pet
Lily: they're not as easy to take care of
 

Chele:: yes they are
Chele:: they already know im not feeding them
Chele:: or washing their clothes

Lily: no, they think you're just saying that

Chele:: I'll cook for them just once and then they will realize its true

Lily: I firmly beleive they all think anything we say is just to use as a bargaining thing later
Lily: maybe I should work on the crappy cook thing &; get some meals made for me

The 100 Aker Woods